The 5 Love Languages is a book written by Gary Chapman. The book is not backed by any academic source but it does have certain points that ring true with me and that I see consistently supported in my own life and the lives of people around me. Knowing how your partner receives love and what makes them feel valued is important. It can guide you in various aspects of your relationship such as how to celebrate milestones, anniversaries, and birthdays, as well as how to make amends. The five love languages are as follows:
This is exactly what it sounds like. Some people think that receiving a gift means that the giver was thinking about them and values them enough to buy or make something special for them.
Acts of Service:
AOS is loosely similar to gift giving but requires doing something for your loved one that you know they would like, such as making dinner, filling their gas tank, or cleaning the house without being asked.
What qualifies as quality time can vary from person to person. For some, this can mean sitting on the couch watching TV or reading books in the same room together. However, it often means giving your spouse your undivided attention. This means things like no phones or TV, uninterrupted talking and listening, or taking walks together. Make sure you ask your partner what counts as quality time for them.
This isn’t all about sex, even though it could be. It also includes holding hands, cuddling, and kissing to express your love.
Words of Affirmation:
Words of Affirmation consists of using words to make your partner happy. This one is my personal favorite. To me this is a type of positive reinforcement. Its not all about saying how beautiful we look (even though we love hearing it), it also means acknowledging your partners hard work and telling them how much they mean to you.
It is important to remember that the way you receive love may differ from your partners. Make sure you communicate your needs with one another as your love language may change over time as you grow. Please note that children also have love languages and knowing what it is can help you build a deeper bond with them.
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